Techno Fear

This is me.

Blissfully unaware of my atrocious bedhead and raccoon eyes. I don’t apologize.

Happy, because I haven’t got a trouble in the world.

This is a representation of my face this morning.

Sad, because my poor laptop needed to see a doctor. Of course, I’ve been trying to diagnose and give it some of my own brand of medicine for a while now…

But apparently it’s not good enough. Who knew that didn’t work?

My fear of Geek Squad and the possibility of having to buy a brand new laptop (I instantly fear the worst case scenario. Always.) led me to worry all day. I started to think about my summer classes – what if I can’t access them? What will I do when I go to NYC and can’t access the class? I can’t fail! What about when I get back to school, I can’t not have a laptop. What if I can’t afford a new one? You can see how the worry spiral got to me… so I turned to the ever brilliant Eddie Izzard for comfort.

For those of you with virgin ears, he does say a few *naughty* words.

I also eased my fears with some “I’m-pissy-because-I’m-PMSing-and-my-computer-sucks” comfort food, which translates into one thing, and one thing only…

…chocolate.

Insanely Easy (and Delicious) Almond Butter Cups

Like Reese’s, but healthy. Because dark chocolate is good for you. 😉

I cannot tell a lie… the only hard part about making these things is waiting for them to freeze. And, of course, not eating the far too many of these suckers once they’re actually done…even if you’re upset and/or worried about your current laptop situation. And your uterus is telling you to eat more.

You’re gonna need:

1/2 cup almond butter (smooth or crunchy, whatever you like)

1 cup yummy, dark, delicious chocolate (and extra for snacking while cooking)

1/4 cup vanilla almond milk

1 tablespoon instant coffee

1 tablespoon good vanilla extract

Melt all of your ingredients (sans almond butter) on a double boiler or in the microwave. You want it to be super silky and melted, just make sure it doesn’t burn. If you use a double boiler (a bowl on top of a pot of boiling water), make sure the bowl doesn’t touch the water.

Take about 10-12 paper cupcake cups and place in a cupcake tin. No need to worry about greasing them though because there’s no baking involved. Pour in a thin layer of chocolate on the bottom. You’ll wanna use about a quarter to a third of your melted chocolate…and no, don’t eat the rest, even if you’re craving it.

Place that layer in the freezer for about an hour, or until it’s hard like Rihanna. Then repeat the process with your almond butter and then the remains of your melted chocolate. Layer, freeze, and repeat. Then lick all the bowls and spoons that you possibly can.

Top with nuts, frozen bananas, or eat ’em as is. I probably ate one too many, but you know what? Life goes on. I’m finally learning that I am who I am, and not what I eat. Thank goodness, or I would glob of hummus.

But for real, these cups are fantastical. They will take away all of your fears and worries.

Until I do resist doing this..

Do you have techno joy or techno fear?

Who’s your favorite comedian?

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