Don’t Be a Scaredy Cat

Question: Why are these crappy fat free, diet, “healthy” foods still on the market?

Answer: Because people are scared.

Do you remember when the whole low fat craze started? Products started coming out that were light, low fat, fat free, and reduced fat. These words, the untrained eye, can be very deceiving. They can make you feel uber comfortable with these foods, as if they can be good for your body. But what people don’t understand is that labels lie, and they’re doing a darn good job with it, too. Eggo, Kellogg’s, Lay’s, and hundreds of other food companies have scared us into thinking that we should buy their “healthier” options.

Reduced fat or sugar, fat or sugar free, or light simply mean the company that makes this nasty stuff altered the chemical makeup of their product. Less fat usually means more sugars. How can a frozen dinner that comes pre-packaged from a manufacturing facility be called all natural? You know what makes Oreos taste good? All the unpronounceable chemicals and artificial sweeteners. You know what makes reduced fat Oreos taste good? All the additional unpronounceable chemicals and sweeteners. And we all know how healthy hydrogenated, modified, refined, bleached, enriched, and artificially flavored things are.

You see, when companies manufacture “low fat” products, they’ve got a system going. A sneaky one. They don’t genuinely want to help you cut calories – that would be bad news bears for them. Less calories for you  means less profits for them, because you’re eating less of their food, right?

Wrong.

Most refined, sugar-laden products are high in carbohydrates. And not the good kind. You know I love me some carbs, but I wouldn’t touch the ones in processed snacks and “diet foods” with a ten foot pole. Refined carbohydrates, like white flour, rice, sugar, high fructose corn syrup, and cakes and cookies all give you energy for a few moments when your blood sugar spikes. But then you soon come crashing down and feel like this:

Friggin tired, man.

I also feel the need to let you in on a big secret. Fat is good for you! I know, I know. Shocking. Take a second and catch your breath if you’ve never been told this before. Believe it or not, fat plays a critical role in our health. I could write a whole post on the benefits of fat (and I probably will) so I’ll just cut to the chase and say it here: fat is not the enemy. You need the stuff to function. You just need the right stuff. More on that in a minute.

So what’s a savvy, smart, but hungry bugger to do? Here’s my top tips for healthy eats.

• Be able to pronounce and recognize all of the ingredients in whatever it is you are eating. The shorter the list is, the better. The ingredients at the top of the list are found more abundantly than those near the end.
• Whatever you’re looking at, don’t buy it if the first ingredient is an artificial sweetener.
• Speaking of sweeteners… stop buying or eating fake sweeteners like Splenda and aspartame. For real, I’m not going into details because you can Google that yourself.
• Go for whole grains. Whether it’s bread, pasta, rice, or flour. And don’t be fooled by the words multigrain or wheat flour. If it doesn’t say 100% whole wheat, it’s not a whole grain.
• Don’t be afraid of fats. Like I said before, you need fat to function, but not all fats are created equal. Stick to monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats. Saturated fats and trans fats have no place in our diets.
• Don’t be intimidated by any claims a label makes. Sugar Adventure Puff cereal can say whatever they want to get you to buy their product, but what the deciding factor should be is how the ingredients stack up.
• My definition of “all natural?” No chemicals, pesticides, artificial ingredients, or hydrogenated oils.
• Read the nutrition facts and the ingredients list while you’re in the store. Screw that lady who’s telling you to move on and just put the box in your cart. Take the time to really know what you’re putting in your body.
• Finally, don’t forget to let yourself have a little splurge sometimes. No one’s perfect, and if you try to eat “perfectly” all the time, you’ll only be disappointed in yourself when you slip up. Don’t have crazy expectations or ridiculously high standards, have wiggle room instead. If you want to eat deep fried Oreo once a year at a state fair, do the damn thing.

So stop being scared. It’s a big wide world out there, but I believe that if you eat what comes from the world and isn’t created away from the world (ie in a factory or laboratory) is just fine.